3 Reasons Supporting Parents Is Wrong

One of the unwritten rules of education is that the parent is always right.  No principal wants to hear from board members that they didn’t treat a parent well. However, always supporting parents will ruin your ability to lead effectively.

Gives rude parents all the power
If a parent believes that they are always right,   ​

regardless of rudeness, they can and often will ask for just about anything.  They will demand that Sally be moved from one room to the next or that a teacher change a grade or extend a deadline. 

It also means that these oppressive parents are getting better treatment and more attention than their easy going polite counterparts.  That just isn’t right.  

It will make your entire staff angry
In conflicts between aggressive parents and teachers it’s okay to consistently side with your teachers.  They have to put up with and be great in the face of parents’ complaints, societal judgements and unrealistic expectations on a daily basis.  

Treating staff like quality members of the team provides them with the value that they’ve earned and deserve. It shows you have their back.  If you don’t support them in the face of an overwhelming parent, smaller things will cause huge resentment and inhibit your ability to lead.  

Of course there are ineffective teachers who don’t communicate well or appropriately with parents, but in a conflict, that is not the time to coach those behaviors.  

Actually leads to worse parent teacher communication
When you put teachers first they will feel secure reaching out to parents knowing if a situation becomes uncomfortable you are there for them.  By showing you value them they will be happier and more energetic.

On the other hand if they are resentful or feel unsupported they are more likely to be short with parents. This can perpetuate a cycle of poor communication not only with troublesome parents but with all parents.  The best you can get is fake politeness and your learning community can sense that.  


Dynamic principals put their staff first knowing that this builds a culture of caring that spills over into students and their families.  The parent isn’t always right.  

What are your strategies for dealing with a parent that is just plain wrong?  Leave you tips in the comment section.